Sunday, October 4, 2015

Happy Sunday!

Friday, October 2, 2015

It's that time of year

Canning has been in full swing lately here at Monkey central.  I've been canning tomato sauce, tomatoes, jelly, and relishes.

I just bought a half bushel of concord grapes to can. I'll make some jelly out of them and can the juice of the rest, which we can drink or I can make into jelly later if I like.

I canned these tomatoes yesterday.  I also canned this pepper and onion relish yesterday as well.

Nothing tastes better than home canned food in the dead of winter and the cold of early spring.

Thursday, October 1, 2015


Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Two sides of the same coin

Films about World War 2 were a staple in the 1960's.  They couldn't crank them out fast enough.  Lately I've been catching up on some of them on Netflix.

I recently watched the epic The Longest Day and Von Ryan's Express.   While ostensibly about the same thing, the war in Europe, they could not have been more different.

The Longest Day is about the invasion of Normandy and Von Ryan's Express is about an escape/liberation from a German POW camp.  One is a grand epic and the other is a much smaller vanity project featuring a pop singer. Longest Day strives for accuracy and mines the facts for it's drama, Von Ryan's tries to rely on Frank Sinatra's fading charisma.  Sinatra sat out the war but many in the Longest Day did not.

The Longest Day features an international cast that included big time stars of the day such as Henry Fonda, Robert Mitchum, Eddie Albert, Sean Connery, Richard Burton, Red Buttons, Gert 'Goldfinger' Frobe, Peter Lawford, Roddy McDowell, Sal Mineo, Edmund O'Brien, George Segal, Rod Steiger, Robert Wagner, Stuart Whitman, and John Wayne.  Von Ryan's is all about making Frank Sinatra look like he's an action hero.

The difference between these two films is glaring and huge.  It's painfully obvious that one was made in order to placate Sinatra's huge ego, and some say this was the film alluded to in the opening scenes of The Godfather, the one where they have to cut off the head of the racehorse and slip it in the producer's bed in order to get the Italian singer the part.  While the other film was made to tell the story of the heroic D-Day invasion.  One was based on historical fact and the other was based on a novel.

I quite liked The Longest Day and I found Von Ryan's Express nearly unwatchable.  But I guess you knew that already.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Lost in translation

"Hey man, I'll cut you if you don't give me some money for the Rand Paul for president campaign!"

"Are you fucking kidding me?  Rand Paul is still running?  He hasn't dropped out yet?"

"Bitch please, of course he's still running.  Now give me some cash for his next ad buy."

"I'm standing my ground against stupid climate change denying, woman hating, Planned Parenthood bashing dopes like him.  So now I'm going to exercise my 2nd Amendment rights."

Monday, September 28, 2015

Alberto Beltran

Mexican artist and illustrator, 3-22-1923 to 4-19*2002.

Sunday, September 27, 2015

How to tell if you're trapped in an Elvis Costello song

  • You tease, you flirt, you shine all the buttons on your green shirt.
  • You're the legendary hitchhiker and you know 'where it's at.'
  • You have a spooky girlfriend.
  • You're a waitress named Teresa who is now known as Juanita.
  • You're a dead Italian tourist.
  • You're just a shabby doll behind a green elevator door.
  • You felt a chill before the winter came.
  • You mind is made up but your mouth is undone.
  • You don't speak any English but you do speak American with out tears.
  • You're somebody's baby with a brand new hairdo and you look fine.
  • You're a little sister who likes to try on your big sister's clothes.
  • You're a boy with a problem.
  • You seriously do not want to go to Chelsea.
  • You want to pump it up.
  • You bay for the boy in the tiger skin trunks.
  • You have a science fiction twin.
  • You sit in your favorite chair very quiet and still while you lose what's left of your mind.
  • You never asked me what I wanted, you only asked me why.
  • You select the plainest face from a spiteful row of girls.
  • You don't know how to be dumb.
  • You gave me a poisoned rose that I could not throw away.
  • The angels wanna wear your red shoes.
  • One of these days you're gonna pay it back, pay it back.
  • You and your sister are doing it again.
  • You traded in your baby for a Chevrolet.
  • All the pretty girls call your name and they love the filthy way you talk.
  • You hope I'm happy now.

Saturday, September 26, 2015

Whatcha thinkin' 'bout?

"That girl I have bound and gagged in my parent's basement."



"The military industrial complex."

"Plaid.  I bet you thought I was going to say racism, didn't you."

"My career as a part time low rent Andy Warhol impersonator." 

Friday, September 25, 2015

Lorenzo Goni

I love this late Spanish artist's surrealistic style.

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

It's Autumn, get jiggy with it

The lovely Autumn Moon and I wish you a lovely autumn.

Happy fall y'all!

Pumpkin spice it up till you puke.

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

A true tale of two actresses

The is the extremely talented and in demand actress Viola Davis.  You probably recognize her from one of her many films or television appearances.  She just won the Emmy award for 'Best Actress in a Dramatic Series,' she's the first African American actress to win that award.  And of course she used her win to advocate for more roles, especially like the one she won the Emmy for, for actresses of color, especially for black actresses.  She did it in a totally classy way that should have upset no one, except for hardcore haters and thin skinned racists.

This is Nancy Grahn.  You probably have no clue as to who she is because she's a rapidly aging 'C' list soap opera actress.  She's in the minor leagues of filmed entertainment, just barely one step above doing dinner theater in some podunk town.  She took exception with Ms. Davis's Emmy acceptance speech.  She was miffed that Davis has the audacity to use her speech to advocate for more roles for women of color.  She also claimed that Davis never experienced any discrimination in her career.  She thought Ms. Davis ought to be speaking out on behalf of all women, not just those of color and she said as much on Twitter.

Jealous much Nancy?  You're career sputtered out in the minor leagues while a much better actress of color eclipsed you many years ago.  And then she goes on to win while you're reduced to sending out tweets while you sit on a gas station toilet and cry because your career will never ever be half the one that Viola Davis has managed to carve out, well that must make your blood boil.  I'll bet you're the type of person who shouts that "ALL LIVES MATTER!" when you hear someone say that "Black lives matter."

And honestly, for you to say that Davis has experienced no discrimination in her career?  Well, that's just some serious stupid right there.  All people of good will, and by that I mean white people like you and me, well, maybe not you, can agree that all black people in the USA face discrimination at some point in their lives, most likely every day or at least every week.  And black women face a higher incidence of discrimination because of a pernicious little thing called 'male privilege,' which means that they face discrimination based on their gender and their skin color, a double whammy if you will.  So for you to confidently and cavalierly assert that a black woman has faced no discrimination in her career, and you may even think that she never faced it in her life as well for all I know, that shows how little you actually know.  And you should be ashamed of yourself for saying that, but I'm sure that after all those years of having to toil in obscurity on a dying entertainment genre, your self esteem and sense of decency died long ago.

Here's what you should have tweeted out in the aftermath of Viola Davis's historic Emmy win:

"Congrats to you Viola Davis, you're much better human being than I am and a way better actress as well."

Or, "I wish I had your talent and your career since mine is shit, I'm stuck still doing soaps for fuck's sake."

One thing is for sure Nancy, we'll never ever have to hear you utter an Emmy acceptance speech.

Monday, September 21, 2015

Fun with old illustrations

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Saturday, September 19, 2015

Friday, September 18, 2015

Bring it

You bring da noise, he'll bring da fokne.